Search Bloguru posts

gotohealth's Blog

https://en.bloguru.com/gotohealth

THE GAME?? - HAPPY NEW YEAR 2018

thread
In the 1980s I organized an English pronunciation class for five or six Japanese wives at the Shorewood apartments on Mercer Island. The class was with the wives of a group of young doctors who had come from Japan to work at Dr. Hakomori’s Cancer Research Lab with Fred Hutchinson Institute.

During one of the classes, Tamami complained about in-laws coming for a visit and everyone commiserated. Her father-in-law was a physician and owned a medical clinic. She was dreading the need to play the role of a proper Japanese daughter-in-law. She was in the United States where those of us with Japanese heritage had shed many of the more cumbersome family obligations and rituals. Changes were also occurring with many of the more modern wives in Japan so Tamami seemed to be looking for an excuse to be more American.

As the teacher, as a wife with grown children and with an interest in psychology, I developed my own “game”. My Masters in Psychosocial Nursing was THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN AND HOW THEY USE SOCIAL SUPPORT. Customs and rituals evolve for coping, creating connections and contributing; which are my 3 C’s of a healthy way to live life. According to historian, Richard White, in his book FOR WHICH IT STANDS, three of life’s bench marks is “making a home, launching our children and preparing for our old age”.

I suggested Tamami consider the in-law visit a short term “game”. With this new perspective, she reported to me, “It was a tremendous success.” Years later, when I made a trip to Japan, Tamami treated me to lunch at the top of one of the famous hotels in Tokyo’s Shinjiku district and we again talked about the game.

Life is a “game” and particularly in the game of marriage there is a physical difference between men and women. Successful relationships require healthy choices and gamesmanship. Our Goto-Health team is inspired to explore and pursue possible game plans as we look to a new year of possibilities.

People Who Wowed This Post

  • If you are a bloguru member, please login.
    Login
  • If you are not a bloguru member, you may request a free account here:
    Request Account
Commenting on this post has been disabled.
Happy
Sad
Surprise