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Penny Simkin is a world famous Child Birth Educator, born in Maine with Mayflower heritage. She has been a close friend for 60 years. We were neighbors in Seattle’s Capitol Hill neighborhood. A nice welcome fuss was made over the fact that we were of Japanese Heritage by all our neighbors. Some of the protest marches came past our houses on 23rd Avenue. Despite all the turmoil of the 1960s, everyone was making efforts to integrate. Penny says, “My Quaker heritage taught me to be accepting and helpful.”

 

What cemented our relationship was when my second pregnancy was interrupted, Thursday, October 26th, 1967; five weeks earlier than the due date. Penny took me to Northwest Hospital with an Abruptio Placenta, with 20-40% mortality of mother and child according to research of that time. I swear, “Daughter Kelly kicked her way out, and we survived because of her quick entrance.” She was in an incubator until she reached 5 pounds two weeks later. According to my husband, that was why we had no more children.

 

It was 12 noon, we had just finished listening to “WUNDA WUNDA” on Channel 5.  My water broke and I started to bleed. I was able to get hold of Penny, dialing the wall phone in the kitchen and then lying down on the floor to talk, with three-year-old Lynette helping as much as she could. Penny, ran over and took Lynette home to her house, where she also had three preschool children. She called Sally Herard. Sally had her own three preschoolers, so Marvin Herard, came to Penny’s house to baby-sit while Penny drove me to Northwest Hospital in her blue/white Volkswagen Bus. Kelly was born at 1:41pm.

 

Penny is a Physical Therapist by education, but she is credited with starting a world-wide  child-birth education movement in 1968. I like to think that we might have had a small influence?

 

For 60 years we have celebrated Penny’s birthday in May, Sally’s birthday in September and my birthday in January. On March 11, 2024, Penny text me and cancelled our Lunch date because she had an upset stomach which ended in hospice care for a mass on her pancreas and a spot on her liver.

 

Nothing like acts of friendship as Penny made Seattle, Washington, home and contributed world-wide. Just got word today, April 11, 2024, that Penny went on ahead of us. 

Wedding is in California and it’s spring and outdoors not far from where Alex grew up in Orange County. I’m in Washington, isolating with COVID! Remembering Sam and my Christmas Eve winter event in 1961 and Lynette and Joe’s summer wedding on a boat in 1994. With Joey and Alex in spirit!!

 

They are likely making commitments of Love, Mutual Respect, Equality and sacrifice with the 60+ guests. 

 

One of the important wedding roles, aside from the bride and groom is the Official, who is granddaughter, Avery. As I understand it, she also participate in a lot of the preparations.

 

Waiting to get more info and pictures. 

Just now, my daughter came to my bedroom doorway and stated, “Mom, Kirin and I just had a discussion about how you act when some of our friends come over. Kirin says, ’You barely say hello and seem mad when Julie comes over.’”

 

Also, my daughter does not have a great opinion of one of my friends because the friend seems so unfriendly. When this friend and I are just the two of us, she is very open and sharing. We are very Japanese American 1950s-conservative about spending and at times act cheap and I'm thinking, “Japanese heritage individuals in America practiced thinking about saving pennies in every aspect of our lives because most everyone focussed on getting  ahead financially.”

 

I’m now thinking, “This is no longer my house. I want the girls to take over and I don’t want to interfere in their lives.” I remember visiting relatives who have their parents living with them. Like those elders, I’m acting like ‘wall paper’ so as to let the next generation take over. Hmmm, this is a good example of miscommunication. That’s what’s interesting about life and our American “melting pot society”.

 

I have been having a debate in my mind about another Japanese friend who acts more elderly so she can get more help. At least, that is how I read her at times. My debate is that maybe she knows better than me how to be more humble, graceful and respected as an elder? And it is also important that her sons feel value for themselves in helping her.

 

Particularly, if they are of Asian heritage and male, I’m put in the front seat of the car. Other times, I’m grandma and in the back seat. I work to not create waves of discomfort. It feels like I’m doing the right things and going with the flow. I’m not one to do a lot of talking and being expressive of what I think. Maybe, I should learn to be more expressive?

 

I think before I say much, and I’ve always been afraid of public speaking. My daughters often say, “Spit it out Mom!” Recently, I’ve had more practice being in front of audiences. I’m listening to celebrities who seemingly are not afraid to take pauses when being recorded.  And having "senior moments" is not all that bad. What helps me the most is to realize my fears are when I worry about myself and “how I look”.  I’m learning to listen and feel what the audiences want to hear.

 

It’s all practice for a “life of learning”, accepting misunderstandings and to keep trying.

 

It’s a thrilling honor to be nominated by the Washington State Historical Society for the award to be given May 4th at the Washington History Museum in Tacoma.

 

Working with history of the Japanese experience in the Pacific Northwest since 1970s and facilitating the OMOIDE writing program the last 30 years is likely the basis of my receiving the award.

 

Over 50 years ago, I got a phone call from Min Masuda, professor of Psychiatry at the University of Washington asking me, “Would you be willing to take a part time job at the UW Suzzalo Library Archives, documenting the Japanese Experience in the Pacific Northwest?” Min had collaborated with Frank Miyamoto of the Social Work department and Rich Berner, creator of the library archives to get a grant and likely heard from my neighbor Mariko Hayashi that I spoke some Japanese. By 1970, very few of us young people, I was a Sansei (third generation), spoke Japanese

 

I was immediately taken aback. My education was in the field of nursing with math and science. I had gotten Honors at Entrance recognition for math with Lewis and Clark College, and had not once thought about history. I immediately answered, “No.” And hung up. I had two preschool girls and no interest in a job outside of home.

 

I laughed about it as I explained to my husband, Sam, what just had happened. He must have thought about it. I had no idea about his interest in history. The next day or two, Sam talked me in to calling Min back and accepting the job.

 

Nursing was the only way I could afford to get a college education because hospitals paid us students to work 30 hours a week as we learned. I never quit what I start so I had become an RN, but never liked carrying-out military type “orders” by physicians. Therefore, I went on to get a Master in Psychosocial Nursing at the U of WA. I learned to love psychology and philosophy. 

 

Grant funding ran out, but I remained on a Min Masuda Archival committee for 20 years. Meanwhile, my girls left home and I realized we could create some of our own documentation of the Japanese Experience by writing stories. We also had no Japanese Historical Society so I helped organize one around 1990. Starting with weekly story sharing in my kitchen in 1991, we published the first OMOIDE I in 1993. Today, 2024 we have a grant to begin gathering stories for OMOIDE VII.

 

It took a lot of showing financial responsibility of us younger generations with Japanese Heritage, but the Nikkei Heritage Association was incorporated in 2003 and eventually incorporated with the Japanese Community Service/Japanese Language School in becoming the 2024 Japanese Cultural and Community Center of Washington. At age 85, I’m still part of the board of directors.

 

Find out about the "J" (jcccw.org).

 It was 10pm. Dad had just come home from his grocery delivery route and was having a late dinner. I sat at the kitchen table to talk. I told him about the ballroom dance lessons that were being started at the Japanese Community Center that next week for us teenagers. Dancing and going to movies was frowned upon by Ontario Baptist Church where we were members. I asked him anyway, “Can I go take the lessons?” 

 

Dad answered, “NO!” We had some discussion; but cutting it short, he headed  down to the cellar to gather Japanese canned food items to replace the empty shelves in his delivery van.

 

Following him out the kitchen door, I  shouted into the cellar stairway, “I hate you!”.

 

Today, I choose this 1950’s Dad story to pass on to future generations; how I too listened to society’s values. Even some of the Japanese community made fun of Dad because he didn’t smoke, didn’t work on Sundays to get ahead and faithfully tithed to his church when he was so poor. The larger caucasian community was making life difficult for Japanese with prejudice and name calling. 

 

Earlier in 1937, there were less than 100 Japanese in that Eastern Oregon area. Dad was one of the few Nisei who spoke fluent English when our family “started over” with row-crop farming in that Eastern Oregon/Western Idaho community along the Snake River. This was after losing their dairy business here in Western Washington because of discrimination.

 

With WWII Executive Order 9066, we too were considered for incarceration - 400 miles inland from the West Coast. Mayor Elmo Smith of Ontario, Oregon, stood up for us and said, “If the government needs to move those with Japanese heritage for USA security, they have to have a place to go and are welcome to Ontario.”  People like my Dad had proven our loyalty. Other small towns in the area continued to have ‘NO JAP” signs all over. 

 

Aunt Ethel remembered Dad helping build and teaching classes at the Japanese Community Center in Ontario. I watched him have coffee with those who called him “JAP” and become friends. We were invited to dinners with caucasian neighbors all my growing up years. He worked at integration.

 

My maternal grandpa helped build Buddhist Churches, here in Seattle area and later the Ontario Buddhist Church, so Buddhist and Japanese traditions were a strong part of our family activities. Dad arranged all the Family/Buddhist services and legal matters when Grandpa’s younger brother died in a car accident in 1947.

 

moving back to Seattle area in 1964, Dad rarely missed Sunday morning/night church services, Wednesday prayer meetings and singing in the choir for himself.  He changed churches several times, to be with more fundamental Caucasian  parishioners.  But he never, ONCE, criticized me for no longer going to church. He exemplified religious freedom.

 

Even when the Seattle Mariners were doing poorly,  he took the bus to the old King Dome regularly.  He was loyal.  

 

I still pray as I learned growing up, but my definition of "God" has added dimensions as I live life and keep learning.

 

Thanks DAD for adjusted memories and I know you appreciated being American and the freedom to worship and develop relationships you enjoyed!

Listening to Morgan Housel who wrote THE PSYCHOLOGY OF MONEY. He says too many of us are wired for “status” and not “happiness” and basically programed for attracting a spouse. Morgan says, “Contentment is not happiness.”  And goes on to say, "Responsibility and tolerance for pain is key for getting ahead financially.” 

 

In my life, I married Sam, and he was a total example of Morgan’s wisdom. Sam particularly demonstrated this in excelling in football when he was awarded a Rotary commendation by the Ontario, Oregon, high school football team. Sam played for Weiser, Idaho, high school as a sophomore 1949. His coach and lifelong favorite mentor, took him to the Rotary Club meeting in Ontario to receive the award of:  Being named the most formidable defensive opponent in the high school football league that year.

 

At Nampa, ID, high school, Sam's trophy for a record in high hurdles was in their trophy case for several years after he graduated.

 

In 58 years at his Seattle Medical Dental practice as a Dental Technician, Sam never missed a day of work. Also, we found a grade school report card where the teacher commends his for never missing a day of school.

 

Sam often repeated his goal to at least live longer than his dad, who died in 1983 at the age of 83. Sam was diagnosed before age 40 with issues of Diabetes like his dad. He said, “I married you because you are a nurse and can take care of yourself.” In 1969, when he was installing an air-condition outlet in his 423 Medical Dental Building office he said, “I felt so bad, I felt like jumping out the window.” 

 

Researching and finding good nutrition was the answer, Sam talked me into developing our nutrition business GOTO-HEALTH in 1977. Therefore, Sam lived to age 85, gardening until the last month of 2017. He was on no prescribed medication until the last month of his life. He lived and worked until the end like he planned.

 

I am benefitting from Sam’s wisdom, life values and financial security. Finally, by the year 2000 (forty years of marriage), we were able to pay all our bills at the end of each month and start saving for medical bills for our old age. This is the heritage we want to pass on!

Lilly is now 90-yrs-old and lives in the family home again, on Bainbridge Island, where her grandfather created his 20-acres farm and was raising strawberries before WWII. Lilly says, "Felix Narte was his main farm hand. Grandpa and Grandma went back to Japan and left the farm to my father, Frank Kitamoto and my mother, Setsuko Nishinaka Kitamoto."  

 

Lilly further explains, “Felix used to baby-sit us and was part of our family. Because Felix took care of the farm and helped us so much, my father gave him an acre, when we got back home after our incarceration. He went back to the Philippines to marry and built his house next door. Now, Felix Jr. lives next door and is still part of our family. 

 

On March 30th 1942, we were the first group, with as little as 1/16 Japanese heritage, incarcerated when President Roosevelt signed Executive Order 9066. I was 7-yrs-old, my sister Frances was 5-yrs-old, my brother Frank Jr was 2-yrs-old and Jane was a baby. We were taken directly to Manzanar in California. but later we were able to move to Minidoka in Idaho where our friends from Seattle were incarcerated. Felix drove all the way from Bainbridge Island to Camp Minidoka with our electric washing machine because he knew my mother needed it for washing diapers.”

 

Lilly also explained how her father was working for FRIEDLANDER JEWERY STORE in Seattle, “Mr Friedland was the one who called us to tell us the Government officials had taken our father straight to prison, without his even being able to come home, when WWII started. Later, Mr Friedlander got permission for my Dad to go to Chicago and learn watch repair. 

 

After the war. Mr Friedlander loaned my father money to start his own jewelry store business in the Bush Hotel on Jackson Street in Seattle. Also, the owner of the Bush Hotel paid for the big locked vault for storage of the valuables. Us kids once complained that we never went on vacations. My father explained, ‘As long as I owe Mr. Friedlander money, we can’t do such a thing until I pay him back.’”