REFUSE TO BE A VICTIM
Sep
4
Practice responding with "I" language Also a good rule,
NO TALKING DURING PROBLEM TIMES
In our household it isn't always dialogue. It's also tone and body language. Times when one doesn't feel good with low energy or over-sensitivity are times to be careful.
Avoid, “You make me feel…”
“I feel…” followed by words like disappointed, frustrated, scared, abused, belittled, berated, betrayed, bitter, broken, cheated, condemned, deceived, degraded, humiliated, inadequate, inferior, insignificant, insulted, mistreated, persecuted, rejected, robbed, scorned, small, squashed, stifled, tormented, tortured or wounded, controlled, judged, manipulated, owned, powerless, repressed, trapped, used, victimized, violated, intimidated or even exploited work the best.
When I’m feeling hurt: abused, belittled, berated, betrayed, bitter, broken, cheated, condemned, deceived, degraded, humiliated, inadequate, inferior, insignificant, insulted, mistreated, persecuted, rejected, robbed, scorned, small, squashed, stifled, tormented, tortured or wounded are good words to remember.
Words for sadness might include: blue, bummed, crushed, defeated, dejected, demoralized, destroyed, disappointed, discontented, discouraged, disheartened, disillusioned, dismal, grieving, gloomy, heartbroken, helpless, hopeless, let down or pessimistic.
When I can’t think of the right words, which is often, the best is to follow the rule: NO TALKING DURING PROBLEM TIMES.
When I talk with parents, I suggest making a date with their kid and have the discussion about adjustments to their behavior in a public place. The suggestion also holds for the parents and adults.
