I hope you can see them in this picture.
What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress - $5,000. Tux rental - $100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Two pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes - one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache... You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes .
No wonder men are happier!
· If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
· If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and Wildman.
When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
· A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
· A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.
· A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.
· The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.
· A woman has the last word in any argument.
· Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
· A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
· A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
· A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
· A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
· A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
· A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
· Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
· Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!
So, send this to the women who have a sense of humor …. and to the men who will enjoy reading.
Despite the fact that US economy is booming, that does not mean all businesses are striving.
I found some things in the refrigerator which are way passed the exp. date and some of the things (used to be food) are cultivating some other life form.
I cleaned them.
I am not Christian but I have grown up with Christmas.
I hope I am not offending anyone by call it as it is.
It will be my fourth year deriving this car.
My car is 2017 Subaru Outback 3.6R Touring.
I test drive the 2020 Subaru Outback XT Touring last weekend and decid3ed to keep current car.
First of all, 2017 has non-turbo 3.6 litter Horizontal 6 cylinder engine. It is a big engine for Outback but it is smooth and quiet. The new one comes with 2.4 litter turbo-charged H4 engine. Which produces little better HP and more torque but is is not s smooth. Unfortunately Subaru does not produce any more H6 engine with I love.
New car has lane-centering capability but it is not as good as I thought. I will not use that feature at this point as it is not as secure. One feature I like on 2020 is that it has an Apple CarPlay. I would really love to have that feature. But I will not buy a new car just for that.
The amazing thing is that this is the very first new car I decided t keep over 36 months. It should tell you how good Subaru is.
By the way, I thought we passed the $30 car tab initiative ... when it it going to be effective. Stupid judge always try to stop the will of people.
When I try to pay for it ... it gave me above screen.
Since then I cannot even see my shopping cart ... I guess until they clear my cart, I will not be able to shop at the Ace Hardware ever ... Hmmm