I am an executive coach supporting and encouraging people who work in companies or organizations.
I will continue to put some key points about coaching at work while reading the book titled "Brilliant Coaching" by Julie Starr.
Going on to "Focused Listening" from yesterday, and today I will describe some points about listening.
Focused Listening, Part2
Part2: How we should listen
- Just as important as our effort to listen is our intention of 'how we are going to listen'. When you listen to someone, your belief or assumption about them would have an impact, favorably or unfavorably, on how you are going to listen.
- Listen from nothing
(1) A specific posture I'd encourage you to develop is your ability to listen 'from nothing'. That is, as you listen to someone, have no assumptions about them or what are saying.
(2) Your mind is free of judgement-type thoughts based on your previous experience of them, as though you now listen to them afresh.
(3) It's a practical experience of being present to them. We have a sense of being with them, rather than being in our own mind, with our thoughts.
- Barriers to listening
(1) We have many and various barriers to listening such as;
- our intention is on ourselves and our thinking
- we like to control the direction of the conversation
- we want to put something of ourselves into the conversation, perhaps to impress the other person or make them like us.
(2) How to overcome the barriers
- the issue is our poor 'self-awareness', i.e. we don't realize that we hijacked a conversation and we have reduced the quality of that conversation as a result.
- when we recognize it, we can ignore our own urge to interrupt.
That' all for today. See you tomorrow!