gotohealth's Blog

GENIUS ZONE

Jan

25

LEARNING TO SEW WAS MOST IMPORTANT IN
THE JAPANESE AMERICAN COMMUNITY AS I WAS GROWING UP!

Today, I’m listening to a Podcast. According to Gay Hendricks, Psychologist/writer, the Genius Zone is that moment one realizes one’s thoughts are dominated by things we can do nothing about. That is the beginning. Moving ahead in the Zone, is when we commit to start concentrating on thoughts followed by actions where we personally have control!

Visiting with my sister not long ago, she remembered how proud of me she was when I made a dress for Ruby in high school. I realize that was one of my GENIUS ZONE MOMENTS. In high school I was often self-effacing and assumed I did not have qualities like some of the popular girls. One day at the end of my senior year in high school, I became aware of Ruby. My friends and I sometimes made fun of her because she wore ragged clothes and never talked to anyone.

I heard my father tell someone how poor Ruby’s family was. I had grown up watching my father help a lot of families. He was the FISHMAN, delivering groceries to Japanese farmers in our TREASURE VALLEY community of Eastern Oregon and Western Idaho, divided by the Snake River.

Hearing my father, I got excited about an idea where I could do something to help someone. I knew how to sew as I hardly owned anything that I hadn’t personally sewn myself because we were also very poor. I went to Mrs. Patrick our high school girl’s counselor. She was a member of the Baptist Church my family attended, so I knew her. I told her I wanted to do this anonymously so that’s why I was asking her to help me deliver my idea. I needed help figuring out the size of a graduation dress I wanted to sew for Ruby.

I no longer remember any of the details of color, style or what else I had to do. I may even had to pump the Singer Sewing machine with a treadle. For my own clothes, we had to drive to the bigger city of Caldwell or Boise, Idaho, to get the quality and choices of material we wanted. So, I must have asked my mom for help to buy the material and pattern. I slightly remember seeing Ruby with the dress on as we marched into the auditorium to receive our 1956 high school diplomas.

FINDING MORE ABOUT WHO I AM

Jan

18

GO ONTARIO, GO ONTARIO
GO OUT AND MAKE THIS A BETTER WORLD!

When I was 9-yrs-old, I skipped a grade. Therefore, I was socially immature. Having buck-teeth and wearing pigtails into Jr. High didn’t help. On top of that, I moved into a class at Ontario High School in Eastern Oregon where the Valedictorian, Dr. Theodore Sakano, was the top scholar at University of Oregon and a professor of chemistry at Rose-Hulman Institute in Terre Haute, Indiana, and later at Rockland Community College in New York. I see his SaddleBrooke Lecture sell-out in 2018, about the Japanese incarceration, with a note from former President George Bush.

Our Salutatorian, Dr. Calvin Tanabe, MD, was a notable neurosurgeon in Portland, Oregon, and served in Viet Nam in MASH-type-situations. Civically oriented, Cal and his wife Mayho contribute saying, “We thought we could return the most to the community by getting people to think.” Cal & Mayho had arranged a date with Dr. Ben Carson for their Portland Arts & Lecture series, but political backlash forced them to cancel.

The President of our class and still a good friend; but living now with dementia in Port Charlotte, Florida, was Loren Cox, He oversaw Asia and Africa with Peace Corp. Loren served as Deputy ED for both the MIT Joint Program and the MIT Center for Energy and Environmental Policy Research. In the 1970s he was a staff member for Representative Al Ullman of the Ways and Means Committee for U.S. House of Representatives, from Malheur County Oregon, where Ontario was the biggest city with 5000 population when I lived there.

Lynn Gallagher and I had arranged to meet where our daughters were living near Half Moon Bay, below San Francisco. But Lynn passed in 2017, living in Washington DC. She graduated from Stanford in journalism, but created Telecom/Telematique International, a boutique consulting firm promoting international development of communication in Africa, Central Asia and the Middle East as a consultant with the U.S. Department of Energy.

Captain Ray Dickerson and I were planning to write a book about our prestigious class and Sam was going to do the illustrations. Ray served in Saudi Arabia where he was the director of vehicle services for the Royal Family and was the escort for Colin Powell visits. Ray passed just before Sam in 2017. He was a “life master” in bridge and said, “What have I ever done to deserve such a great life”.

Our vision for the book was, how we all came together in Ontario, Oregon, from Spain, Mexico, Japan, Canada, all parts USA in the late 1800s with great heritage values. We all learned to work hard on the Eastern Oregon farms.Then we went to all parts of the world again and served. Two Ontario High School students were/is Washington State Senators, Jim Honeyford, who retired last year and Steve Conway.

All 117 of our 1956 graduates have created powerful stories. I look back and see myself as self-effacing, mousey and shy, but grateful for the experience of knowing how it feels. I’m still non-competitive but social and persistent with learning the path of love and service for a fulfilling life and legacy.

No wonder I got better grades in college than in high school with such a bell curve.

85th BIRTHDAY

Jan

14

NOT TOO SWEET?

GRANDSON, ZACHARY, PART OF THE TEAM THAT WON THE SWIM MEET.

NOTHING LIKE CELEBRATING WITH FAMILY

My daughters gave me this wonderful trip to see my grandson's UC Santa Barabara Swim Team win their swim meet. What a treat and what a weekend.

Went shopping at the Santa Barbara Mall. So quaint! Found an outfit to wear to Grandson #1's wedding this next April.

Life is good!

Turning out

like it should!

LEARNING MORE ABOUT WHO I AM

Jan

7

According to Meyers-Briggs, I am an ENFJ or teacher

My New Year affirmation for 2024 is: "To bring my best to the table and focus on being nice."

My New year resolution is to keep learning and stay on my path of life - developing resources for HAPPIERNESS. I will focus on being nice. It is also recommended that I listen to my heart rather than my egotistical brain.

Research suggests, the heart deals more with the "right brain" and bigger picture of art, and nature. GOODNESS, TRUTH & BEAUTY brings balance to our Western Culture of the focussed "left brain" on math, science, laws, monetary goals and accomplishments.

According to Meyers-Briggs, I am ENFJ - Extroverted, Intuitive, Feeling and Judging. The explanations suggest, this makes me and inspiring optimist, open-minded, cooperative and organized. I'm happy with this.

I also took the Big 5 Personality Test:

Openness = 63.20%
Conscientiousness = 75.40%
Extraversion = 78.30%
Agreeableness = 93.90%
Neuroticism = 0.10%

I like learning, organizing my thoughts and sharing.

NEW YEAR'S EVE - DECEMBER 31ST

Dec

31

New Year Eve 2017, the Goto brothers and sisters gathered to wish Sam Goto farewell. As the day passed, sister Irene commented, “Do you realize Sam was born on the 13th and today is the 31st?”

When Sam and I first started dating in 1960, I was studying at his 1438 Medical Dental Building office. As a Dental Technician, working late for Sam was common. I was completing my Public Health Nursing degree at the University of Washington. For some reason, Sam commented, “I was born on Friday the 13th.” That year the Seattle phone directory had calendars for many previous years. So, I looked up when Friday the 13th occurred in 1933, knowing he was six years older than me.

I found Friday the 13th was in January that year. Since my birthday is January 14th, it was another confirmation that maybe we were meant to be together? If one believes in Numerology, I’m a number 1 and Sam is a number 3, which together is a 13? :-)

He had two birthday parties, one when he was 13 and the other when he was 31.

Several years later, in 1971, we decided to reward ourselves with a 10th anniversary trip to Japan. We had to go to the City of Seattle Vital Statistics to get a copy of his birth certificate to get our passport.

To our surprise, not only was Sam born on Friday the 13th, he was born at 1303 Washington Street, at 3am at the home of a Japanese midwife. He was listed as the 3rd child of a mother 23 and a father 33. Their address was Lot 1, box 31 - 3C, Renton, Washington.

One month later, we were at the Takanawa Prince Hotel in Tokyo. I was hanging my dress in the closet and saw that the cleaning tag was #3. Then Sam and I talked about the day being October 3rd. But we commented, “At least we are on the 14th floor.” The next morning we realized there was no 13th floor so our room was actually on floor 13.

Subsequently, our life has been filled with 3s, 13s, coincidences and serendipities. It wasn’t totally clear, but in his last days, we asked him to give us sign of his communication after his passing. He indicated that it would be for us to notice the number13.

CHRISTMAS EVE MEMORIES

Dec

24

My favorite picture!!

A peaceful (end?) to a great partnership!!
1961 - 2017

Christmas Eve was always exceptional, from the snowy 1961 evening in Eastern Oregon to the snowy 2017 goodby on Mercer Island.

Sam and I were married in Ontario, Oregon, at the First Baptist Church on Christmas Eve. It was a Sunday that year and the day my favorite Uncles would take time off from their Ontario Market business to be able to attend.

Sam created 56 more wonderful Christmas Eve memories. It was always special and always included the girls. One of the best memories is when we went to the Red Lion on Airport Way. Those days, restaurants were empty on Christmas Eve so we kind of had the whole place to ourselves. The memory was around 1971. WE WERE IMPRESSED and we still talks about the memory because the chef brought the salad ingredients on a cart to our table, tossing it and serving us individually!

I think that was the year Sam made me a charm bracelet with ten gold charms commemorating special moments in our 10 year marriage. Thereafter, I got a gold ring stapled to a silly card every year where we were out celebrating Christmas eve. My favorite is the ring that is the image of our house, we built in 1973. Another favorite is a black rock from our back yard, made to look like a rabbit with a gold heart on it’s butt, because that is my birth year sign. I often wear the cat curled up around a pearl because we saw the broadway musical CATS in New York that year.

A Sam favorite ring memory might be the illegal rock he picked up on our trip to Machu Picchu in Peru. It might also be the Mammoth Image ring commemorating a trip to the South Dakota Hot Springs Mammoth dig in 1995. Sam was Vice President of his high school senior class in Nampa, Idaho, and the president was Larry Agenbroad, Paleontologist, who created the Mammoth sight and has been on National Geographic Specials several times.

Japanese style, Sam put an extra ordinary amount of thought into not being publicly recognized, but family were the benefactors for his private creativity and Love. We continue to revel in the legacy of 56 Christmas Eve gold ring memories, his 240 cartoon strips and his 40 years of never missing bi-monthly Shaklee newsletter drawings.

There is more and more empirical evidence that Sam likely continues to extend his energy in what our family may be creating today? LOVE IT!!

TIS THE SEASON

Dec

19

FROM OUR HOUSE TO YOURS WISHING YOU
A MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPIER NEW YEAR

The newest version of my “purpose in life” is: To keep learning ways to know God and spread HAPPIERNESS - little steps of personal responsibility bringing a little more happiness every day. The grand goal of “happy” is just staying on the life path towards gaining wisdom and fulfillment.

One of those little happierness ways, for Sam and me, has been to spread stories about family and heritage values. We’ve needed everyone’s input!! Our family tree is expanding with Grandson Joey and Alex getting married this next April.

With the publishing of our family stories in COLUMBIA MAGAZINE, I’ve gotten to be closer friends with editor, Julianna Verboort. I am excited! She has agreed to collaborate in being a “Developmental Editor” as we produce a Historical Fiction novel with a melding of Sam and his dad’s character as the main protagonist.

Having Kelly and the girl’s activities close brings a lot of smiles. Now that Kirin can drive, no one has to awaken @ 5:30 four days a week to take her to 6:15am Drill Team practices nor evening rush hour driving for Karate in North Seattle.

Our next OMOIDE (MEMORIES) book will be: STORIES OF RESILIENCE AND COMPASSION DURING HARDSHIP. Please call me, if you know a story about hardship times before and after incarceration where a community member stepped in to help. Maybe a neighbor/friend took care of your family house or property while everyone went to camp or maybe a teacher/mentor made a big difference in your life? Also incidents of picking up our own bootstraps during hard times is important!

“The important thing is to never stop questioning!” -Einstein

DEE GOTO AND GIRLS

GO SANTA BARBARA SWIM TEAM GAUCHOS!!!!!

“NEVER LEAVE THE PAN HANDLE STICKING OUT!”

Dec

4

The only picture we can find of Roy.
Around 1931

It was January 1962, Sam and I had returned from our honeymoon, visiting southern California. We were beginning our married life at 411 Federal Avenue E, a block east of Marketime in the Broadway District on Seattle’s Capitol Hill.

I was making some stir fry and rice for dinner, Sam walked into the kitchen area, off the entry living room, pushed the pan handle in as he made an “ahem” noise. This happened a few other times. Then one day he said more firmly, “Please don’t leave the pan handle sticking out.”

Another day he came into the kitchen and said, “My Mom taught me to never leave the pan handle sticking out!” Sam was not one to talk a lot nor give me directions and was generally respectful. I’m also not that reactive so I didn’t think much more about the comments.

Over two years later, we had bought our house on 23rd Avenue East and we had our first daughter, born July 15, 1964. This one day, Sam came home from his dental lab in Seattle’s Medical-Dental Building. I was fixing dinner and he more forcefully said, “NEVER LEAVE A PAN HANDLE STICKING OUT!

So, I answered, “OKAY, but why are you so upset about it?”

Sam, hung up his jacket, checked on Lynette sleeping in her bassinet, came back into the kitchen and continued to explain, “Well, I never knew him, but I had a brother. I’m not the second son, that’s why Fred is four years older than me. His name was Roy. Mom says he was old enough to walk and came into her kitchen, reached for the pan handle and pulled the hot water onto himself.”

Rechecking our daughter in her bassinet, I was stunned with chills of what Sam’s parents must have gone through. Roy’s grave is in Kent, WA, where Grandpa Nakanishi bought the twelve family plots in the Japanese Section of the Hillcrest Cemetery in 1925.”

The photo is from Sam’s Dad, Nisaburo’s, black photo album of the 1920s and 30s when Nisaburo was single and first married. It looks like it’s just a little after 9am outside the cafe they once had across from the Immigration Building off 5th and Dearborn in Seattle. The year of the picture is likely 1931.

Ironically, the crease goes right across Roy’s face. None of the other pictures in the album are similarly mutilated. This story still elicits teeth clenching imagination of pain and heartbreak, as we look at the only picture we have of Roy sitting on his mom, Masako’s lap.

BALLAD OF TOM MIYAO

Nov

20

Keepsake dice with Tom's initials given to Sam Goto in 1951

We took a side trip to Northern Nebraska on a 1995 fossil hunting trip through Montana, Wyoming, South Dakota where Tom had lived. All through our 30 years of marriage, I had constantly heard from Sam, “The best steak I’ve ever had was on the trip to Cody, Nebraska, with Dad and Fred in 1951. Tom knew how to age it and cook it JUST RIGHT!”. We could never duplicate that memory, but we tried one more time.

Smiling, we commented on the Highway-20 sign, “CODY NEBRASKA, Population 177”, “Civilization? In the middle of miles of nothing.” We were greeted by children, vigorously waving from their yards, as we passed a couple houses. Easily finding the only restaurant, we parked, climbed the few old steps and opened the weather protecting double doors. The place was almost empty as it was already 2PM. Sam could see two seventy-plus ladies at the far wall booth, with tips already on the table. Without hesitation, Sam walked briskly over and asked, “Have you lived here long?”

One of the ladies, with questioning eyes and a tilt of her head, happily answered, “Yes!”.

Sam quickly went on, “My Dad had a cousin named Tom…”

She grinned and interrupted, throwing up her hands, “You mean Tommy Miyoo?! I used to work for him! I started as a teenager.”

Here’s what we learned:

Grandpa Goto had a cousin,
His name was TOM MIYAO.
He came from Hiroshima,
And worked at cooking chow.

He might have worked on the railroad
Spending time at the local bar.
We know for sure he lived in Grandview, Montana
All through the first World War.

He learned to deal cards In Billings,
Then was Winner, South Dakota, bound.
Tom was a regular gambler,
But one of the nicest ones around.

Old Jack Stotts brought him down from Winner
To manage the Cody, Diamond X Cafe.
Tom drove a fancy green convertible,
Visiting Goto cousins in Nampa, Idaho, that way.

Once he lost his diamond ring,
The help looked high and low,
Through the one street alley of Cody,
A week, a month or so.

Staring out the restaurant window,
The sun flashed on a facet.
Tom ran out to the alley,
Recovering his valuable asset.

When the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor,
Tom thought it was a disgrace.
He went several days into hiding
And wouldn’t show his face.

They say Tommy was patriotic,
And all were recipients of his treats.
As men (some women) left for service,
Each got money, cigarettes and sweets.

Don Adams, the postmaster, laughs about,
Hershey Bar treats for his one-year-old son.
“Go wash, face dirty,” Tom would chuckle,
Making sure the duty was done.

According to Mildred Chubbs, his waitress,
Whom we’d met at the Cody Bar and Grill.
She’d worked through the late1930s and 40s,
Meeting us relatives, was a special thrill.

It turns out she is the town historian
And with Helen, her friend,
Went home and got some pictures,
Taking us to the cemetery at the end.

Tommy was a drinker
Which was his final downfall, and alas,
He chased some whiskey with ammonia
The cleaning lady had left in a glass.

The grave read: July 7, 1888 - January 21, 1963
Tom was 74-years-old when he died.
Colorful, but unremarkable gambler, drinker,
At a distance, his relatives had decried.

But those who live in Cody, valued him as family.
And to his grave, residents still bring flowers,
Thanking him for years of love and service,
Painfully, remembering his final hours.

No, we did not have a chance to try a steak in Cody. A few years latter in Dallas, TX, we came close with a $30 steak at one of the hotels there.

HAPPINESS IS NOT A DESTINATION; HAPPINESS IS A DIRECTION

Nov

11

Quote that has been on our kitchen fridge for 50 years!!!
"We need adversity to keep us vigilant, safe and to learn." - Arthur Brooks

I just awakened from a nightmare!! In my dream, I all of a sudden lost the convertible car I was driving along with our dog and purse in which I was carrying a few hundred dollars. I managed to call my husband and retraced my steps, but finally, we decided I had to get a job with my nursing skills to make up for the loss.

Nothing like waking up to find that it was a dream!!! The seed for loving life more this morning.

Today, I'm listening to Tim Ferris as he interviews Arthur Brooks, Harvard professor of Happiness studies who grew up in Seattle. It also drives me crazy to hear the standard goal in life: "I want to be happy!" I like his suggestion that we work to achieve "HAPPIERNESS".

Brooks says, "Three big areas one can address to work on HAPPIER Is:
1. Looking for Enjoyment.
2. Finding Satisfaction.
3. Deciding on Purpose and Meaning for one's life."

There is one question Brooks poses with which I disagree. In searching for meaning he suggests: "What are you willing to die for?"

I look at life here on earth a little differently. Dying is easy. It's not something to be afraid of. Life and struggles are a privilege. I think the question should be, "What are you willing to live for?"

Two incidents have clarified Meaning for me. When our first daughter was born, I stared at the miracle of life who was nothing a year earlier. It occurred to me that I would see great grandchildren! I decided I wanted to see responsible, kind, resilient, truth telling individuals. Therefore, I asked myself, "What do I need to do to parent Lynette, who would need to parent her future children to parent?"

We're almost there as our first grandson is getting married soon and Lynette and Joe have done great so far. Of course, the purpose needs to extend to the children of all five of our grandchildren with building character.

The second incident was in 1972 when I was a teacher's assistant at Stevens Elementary School in Seattle. Juanita Thomas was my head teacher and I learned so much from her with many deep philosophical discussions. One night I had a dream that I was carried up in rapture and ALL I HAD TO DO WAS BELIEVE. I do believe in God along with doing what's right. All the requirements of various human led groups are choices that I may or may not want to abide by, depending on what I want for social connections.

For sure, I'm happier to be daily listening to good advice, starting each morning with thoughts of thankfulness, making plans for being happier each day and sharing with others on this blog.

gotohealth's Blog

GENIUS ZONE

FINDING MORE ABOUT WHO I AM

85th BIRTHDAY

LEARNING MORE ABOUT WHO I AM

NEW YEAR'S EVE - DECEMBER 31ST

CHRISTMAS EVE MEMORIES

TIS THE SEASON

“NEVER LEAVE THE PAN HANDLE STICKING OUT!”

BALLAD OF TOM MIYAO

HAPPINESS IS NOT A DESTINATION; HAPPINESS IS A DIRECTION

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