Where I am from (詩)

Where I am from　(詩)

Aug

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車窓から、故郷の田園風景

この詩は、大学院の宿題の一つで、久しぶりに書きました。故郷や、自分の生い立ちが脳裏に浮かびながら朗読しました。

Where I’m From

The patchwork of rice fields, the beautiful river, and mountains,
Cherry blossoms dress our town pink in the spring,

Fragrances of field mustard and Renge flowers. Obento under the cherry tree
is simply the best.

Everything is green in rice fields in the summer, locusts sing all day long, mosquitos pester me
When I was almost asleep, popsicles and watermelon were my snacks.

The typhoon was entertaining to us as children, but not to my grandpa as a rice farmer.

Everything is gold in the autumn, the smell of freshly harvested rice fields, the smell of baked Sweet potatoes in the dry straw on the rice field, we ran around, played tag in the field while Baking sweet potatoes.

Frost makes everything white in winter, with mochi and tangerine all the family member sit Warm under the Kotatsu.

Bonito in Spring, eel in summer, saury in fall, and oysters in winter,
Richness of seafood.

Ocean is only 30 minutes away
A very small town in Japan.

That is my hometown.

Grandpa, grandma, uncle, aunt, my mom, my brother, and sister lived together
In a big wooden house.

Most of our neighbors were our relatives. We knew everything about each other.

Everybody knew my secrets and my shame. Nothing is personal.

Children in the neighborhood grew up together like blood.

There were always somebody’s children at home, playing, doing homework, and eating.

We played hide and seek, baseball, climbing up persimmon tree and being yelled at.

And make-believe, I always loved playing the mother.

We made snacks at home with other kids, hot-cakes, cookies and crepes.

The Japanese say, “A nail that stands will be hammered down.”

I couldn’t stand out otherwise my neighbor would find out and say something to my family.

I can’t stand out, I can’t be too pretty, too ugly, too dumb…. “More than enough is too much.”

“If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.” Hard to find my own beauty, goodness, and voice.

“Who am I?” was my life question.

Harmony and conformity are what make you beautiful and useful.
This is where I’m from.

800,000 gods in Japan, but believing in Jesus is a “no, no”
It is not our tradition. It is not our family religion.

“A nail that stands will be hammered down.” I became a Christian. I stood out.
But a true journey started ever since. A journey of finding my identity, voice, race, and destiny.

Holy Spirit made me strong, not to be afraid of being different.

I am different. But I am beautiful.

Once I was hammered down. But God raised me up again.

I am different. I speak English and live in America, but not belong here.
Not quite belong to Japan anymore.

I am different. But I am beautiful.

And I love my beautiful home, Japan.

by ぼ

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Commented by 齋藤純二
Posted at 2017-08-11 22:38

自分らしく生きようとする時、「出た杭は打たれる」のかもしれない。しかし、なぜ杭は出たのか、それは出たかったからであろう。そこに自身の真実への原動が潜伏していて、何かの光景にハッと目覚め起動し始める。それは、周りの理解が得られないとしても進もうとする強さを持っている。その「自分らしく」の杭は打たれても望まない思想には埋まることは決してない。神の導いた道を踏みしめて光あるところに進んで行こう。心には愛する日本がある。そして今、私はアメリカにいる。

と、勝手に考えながらbokushiさんの珠玉の御作を堪能いたしました。英語ではなかなか読みきれなかったので、翻訳ソフトを使い読みました。素晴らしいですね。ご自身の生い立ち、お気持ちを覗き素直に表現され、情景(景色がきれい)が目に浮かびながら拝読いたしました。

I am different. But I am beautiful. 

この言葉がご自身の杭を支える強くしなやかな意志のように感じました。うーん、カッコいいなあ！

また、詩を拝読させてくださいね！

Commented by bokushi
Posted at 2017-08-11 22:54

斎藤さん
寛容なお言葉ありがとうございます。。
異国に住んでいると、こちらにもあちらにも馴染み切れない、しかし、故郷や家族を思うといつもじーんとする。。。そんな毎日です。。
こちらにいると、日本人である意味を深く考えさせられます。そして、日本人に生まれて本当に良かったと思い感謝します。また、書いてみようかなぁー。